on "缘份"

was reading some hwz forums and decided to post about this.  the chinese word for fate is compounded by 2 words: "缘"(yuan) and "份"(fen). the first word, "缘", essentially holds the same meaning as its english counterpart: fate. however, the second word, "份" introduces a concept of measurement, which in turns controls the fate. a difficult concept to grasp right?

for instance, 2 persons getting to know or even bumping into each other is termed "缘", or fate or serendipity.we all have plenty of "缘" with many people daily. but what helps to determine whether this "缘" will continue? this is controlled by the chinese concept of "份".

the "份" part determines how far the relationship goes.when the "份" part runs out, the "缘" gets terminated in one way or another. hence the chinese phrase "有缘无份" - fate allows the meeting that weren't meant to last.

though i strongly believe people control their own destiny, there's only so much that one can control. there's pretty nothing much one can do when the "缘" ends.  trying to retain someone who is no longer supposed to be there is a tragedy in my opinion.

anyway i think i dun have much "份" with the people around me. i used to have a close friend, but one fine day he had an accident and was declared brain-dead on the spot and was gone. other people came, but try as i might, they never really stay. somehow somewhere along the way there's bound to be some distractions or conflicts or dramas. well, people's priorities do change over time. hardly get to see my family members too as i am currently all alone in singapore.

there's this one great colleague friend i once had. if i am not wrong we always hang-out at similar places (determined from blog posts), but we never bumped into each other. seems like when one is out, the other is at home, or when both are out, we will end up at 2 entirely different locations. it looks as if there's no chance of reconciliation.

to put it scientifically, you might have all the factors but the quantity and quality was insufficient in comparison to something else. perhaps just not enough of something, not good enough of another so despite being together for a long while, it just didn't work in the end. nothing wrong with that, just that somehow the cards we received didn't fall together into the correct places.

and thus, life goes on...